I don't know what to do

[bridgette15]

I feel lonely. The guy I like was playing me. My best friend is a guy. He stops talking to me once he gets a girlfriend. I dont know how to deal with all of this? please help me

[Jennifer]

What kind of help are you looking for? Do you want to change? Find out why your best friend stops talking to you? or about your relationships? Need some clarification.

[bridgette15]

I want to be happy again. I feel like a zombie. All I do is think about him, when i know he dont even care if im alive. I dont want to rely on a man to make me happy

[Jennifer]

Then you will be happy again because the only way that you can be happy is from within. This is the main reason that people are miserable in relationships because the feeling you get of happiness from others is short lived and sometimes people even become life partners because of that feeling.

It is much better to give yourself some space and let yourself grieve, heal and figure out who you are in order to be with the right person. Too many people are with the wrong person and its sad.

[bridgette15]

I tried so hard to realize i need to be alone and figure out who i am. I don't like to be alone. Thats my biggest fear. I haven't been alone like this in five years/

[Jennifer]

there is being alone and being lonely. two different things and sounds as if you are scard of being lonely. that would happen if you were in a relationship or not. better to learn how to be alone and be okay with yourself than always try to run away from being lonely. it will make you a better/stronger person for it.

[bridgette15]

I fully understand what you are saying. I just dont know how to be fine with being alone without calling someone up to keep me company. I dont know what to do with my self when it comes to that.

[Jennifer]

start small and see how it feels, such as going to see a movie by yourself? or shopping. It is okay to want to be around other people, just not to need to be around them. we are social creatures and crave social attention and if someone was not interacting at all that would not be good either.

We are only talking about this because you wanted to know how to move forward and stop getting hurt by people. People will always try to hurt others and we need to be strong to let it go and move forward. In order to do that, we need to have a strong inner self and hence being okay with being alone.

[bridgette15]

I do go shopping alone and its ok. It is just hard to stick that when I am a sex addict

[Jennifer]

what is it that you want help with then?

[bridgette15]

I need help with learning how not to rely on sex and man to make me happy

[Jennifer]

okay, are you actually a sex addict or do you just use sex to emotionally connect to men?

[bridgette15]

I ues sex to emotionally try to connect with men, but at the same time I always want it and I know i am setting myself up for failure when it comes to love and relationships.

[Jennifer]

you are not alone in thinking this. are you close with your family? did you have to try to win their emotion by acting a certain way. We learn behaviours from others and in order to break the habits you need to relearn a new behaviour.

It is not so much about needing sex for emotion it is about finding yourself and being okay with who you are and wanting sex with a parter because you have an emotional connection.

Not many people know the difference and kudos to you for making an effort to know the difference and try to change.

[bridgette15]

Im not that close with my family. i hide my feeling from then and I was molested as a child. When im sad or stressed, i use sex to escape. Thats all i really know and i also want to break that habbit