I am insecure

[Maya]

Its official. My insecurities are getting the best of me and I want to get rid of this destructive behaviour. Adam just recently told me that our relationship would be perfect if only I wasn't insecure. He is right- I am sabatoging our relationship with my insecurities and jealousy.

I don't want to argue anymore and I want to face them head on. I know I am attractive. Heck many people find me attractive and I can sense that. I am not being big headed- I just know that on my good days I feel great. I love my body and am comfortable in my own skin.

The issue- which Adam pointed out- is that although I know I am attractive, I am also aware that there are others out there more attractive. AND that it is simply in my head because he still finds me hot.
That is true thu I do think that way and I do feel that he is attracted to others more than he is to me because I am no longer the new girl in town- I am now comfortable for him.
For example this girl in our friend circle which Adam seems to fawn over due to certain assets which although I do have are not as large as hers if you catch my drift. So I do find her more attractive and view her as someone that Adam would love to be with- not in a relationship- just for fun.
He says that its just exciting to flirt with her cause she is new and I responded so that means that I am old news I get it. He says I am not old, I am comfortable. While Adam still compliments me and makes moves on me- I feel jealous of this girl. And honestly why should I- I am prettier and a lot more fun. Plus I am the girl he wants to spend the rest of his life with. But I do feel jealous whenever he goes out of his way to chat with her and how his face lights up when she flirts back. Then to make matters fine with me because he sees that I am upset- he begins to compliment me and remind me how great I am.

Listen- at the end of it all- I don't want these negative feelings anymore. I am an amazing person. I am also a jealous person and don't want to be anymore. I am putting my foot down. Its not Adams fault I act this way and I have blamed him for my insecurities for a long time and that has to stop.

This is my doing. I believe I am insecure but don't understand why I am. How can I get rid of my insecurities? And how can I figure out why I am insecure? If I understand that- then perhaps I can tackle each point.

What do you suggest I do.

[Jennifer]

i think you need to tell your boyfriend that it is NOT okay to flirt with other girls then to wonder why you are upset. he can either make you feel secure or not, sounds as if he gets away with acting however he chooses then blames you for your relationship problems, NOT cool at all.