broken heart

Mr.Jones · Joined: 28 May 2008 Posts: 4

I am about to be a senior this upcoming school year and last year I fell in love with my currently ex-girlfriend who will be a college freshman this fall. We got together soon after she broke up with her boyfriend of almost two years. We were together from September until February. She said she had feelings for her ex. I was so in love with her, I didn't want to let go. We officially broke up at the beginning of April after I went off about her acting like she didn't want to be with me. I have been trying to get an understanding of why she didn't want to be with me when she once told me that I was so important to her and that she loved me and it has just been on my mind almost nonstop. I was really heart broken after this and she recently told me that she is not only with someone else but she is in love. That leads me to believe that she went back to her ex. I feel that I am a better man than him and I don't understand why she would leave me for him or anyone else for that matter. However, I try to move on and forget her, but a lot of things I do or think someone find a way to be linked to thoughts of her. She was my first serious girlfriend and I really loved her and thought that we were perfect for each other. I'm trying to move on and rebuild my broken heart before I seriously try looking for any other fish in the sea. I just don't really know what to do.
How do I truly get over her and get her off my mind?

Jennifer · Site Admin Joined: 27 May 2007 Posts: 2356

Well, firstly good for you for dealing with this in a mature manner and it sounds like it is her loss entirely. I am sure that people will tell you all the time, to just "get over it". Well, it does not work that way. The only thing that mends the heart is time and since you are trying to learn from this experience and not just move into a new relationship, you will find true love again and you will be able to use this experience as a learning tool and make the next relationship better. Please don't become bitter or think that you can avoid getting hurt, because you cannot. With the joys of love comes the pain of hurt. Just works that way, but once you get through the first one (which is always the hardest), you realize that you can do it. Everyday that goes by, the pain will lessen and one day you will not think of her so much, until then, lean on your support system and keep busy in a productive way.

Mr.Jones · Joined: 28 May 2008 Posts: 4

Another problem I have is that every time I wake up, especially when I go to sleep in my bed, memories and thoughts of her fill my mind. It really makes me feel sad, because it's like I'm starting over every day because I have to get over her again and again. I usually start getting over it by getting up and finding something else to do. I guess that's all I can do for now right?

Jennifer · Site Admin Joined: 27 May 2007 Posts: 2356

The most important thing that you need to remember is be true to your feelings. If at night is sad for you, then be sad and if you have good times during the day that is okay too. Like I said, evenutally it will get better. Yes, what you are doing is great for now. Have a good night!

B1987 · Joined: 17 Sep 2008 Posts: 14

I just want to say this....i believe everything happens for a reason, and believe me i've had my share of heartache. I think that if your not together anymore than there's a reason for that, she wasn't the one for you, and further more why would you want to be devoted to someone if she's not to you? i know it's hard to get over someone you love but really if you guys are suppost to be together than you will be if not then chances are there's someone better out there for you and that's why your not with her. THere is a plan for all of us.

I wish you the best Very Happy

Mr.Jones · Joined: 28 May 2008 Posts: 4

It took me a good deal of the summer, but I'm over it now. Thanks for your comment though. You were so right by the way. I guess might still have a scar, but I also learned from this relationship and I'm moving on with my life....
Class of 2009!
Don't forget to celebrate it!!!

Mr.Jones · Joined: 28 May 2008 Posts: 4

It took me a good deal of the summer, but I'm over it now. Thanks for your comment though. You were so right by the way. I guess might still have a scar, but I also learned from this relationship and I'm moving on with my life....
Class of 2009!
Don't forget to celebrate it!!!

Jennifer · Site Admin Joined: 27 May 2007 Posts: 2356

Awesome and you handled things the right way and now you can move forward. We are always here if you need anything Very Happy