Dealing With Change
- Jennifer Baxt, LMFT, LMHC
Change can be a wonderful experience for many people. It can be exciting and something that can break up the boring monotonous routine that can get on just about anyones nerves over time. There are, however, times when a particular change is not welcome and actually causes some stress on the person who is affected by the stress. This kind of change can be just about anything, from an unexpected and unwanted move from a place the person is renting, of which the owner of the home has decided to sell to someone else who does not want tenants, to facing a transfer where the worker will have to take it or to start looking for another job. While change can be a wonderful thing when it means a promotion or finally moving into that house the person has always wanted, change can be frightening to the point of driving the individual into anxiety or worry about what will become of them in the future with this change.
When feeling stressed, it helps if the person takes a minute to sit down and think about what it is that might be causing them the stress. They start going through everything that might cause them some excessive worry, but it all finally centers on one thing; change. This person realizes that this new job, or them finally moving out on their own and are now in charge of their own life, or they have moved to a new city where they wanted to start over but still need to find a job or anything else that could be classified as a big change in their lives, is what is probably causing them more stress. The worries start to set in with how am I going to be able to afford this new rent, am I really capable of this job with all its responsibilities, or any other questions or worries that can come to mind that would make one tense up and sweat over. Soon the mind starts to become overflowed with a million things that could go wrong as a result of this change and before the person knows it their vivid imagination has run off with them. This can leave a person more pessimistic about their future and they feel that this change can only bring bad luck on them.
It is important that a person gets control of themselves and starts to rationalize that change can actually be for the better. It can often help to consult a therapist or a counselor about all their worries and possible future troubles that they fear. The therapist or counselor can act as a sounding board for the patient to let out everything that concerns them to the point of anxiety. The therapist can then help the patient to organize these thoughts and talk about how many of these worries are unwarranted. Further therapy can help the patient accept that while any change can come with some risk; a big change in a persons life can actually spark wonderful results and opportunities that can benefit the person in the end. The therapist can then help the patient calm down and feel more confident about the change in their life.
As with anything, change can be a good or a bad thing. Much of it depends on whether they take it in a positive or negative way. For the more pessimistic or less confident individuals, therapy can be a safe way to help deal with the change in their life in a more positive way.