How do you deal with your partner's substance abuse?
When most couples get married, there are few negative thoughts that will enter their minds; least of all is substance abuse. Most believe that when they get married, they will generally have a good marriage. Unfortunately, this is not always the case and many marriages will suffer difficulties, including problems with substance abuse. People change over time, so it is not always something that can be predicted, but it can happen. Stresses build, life becomes darker and this is where substance abuse can enter. It may not be noticed at first, but it will be when it becomes a full addiction that changes the husbands or wifes behavior, attitude and personality. When this does happen, it can leave the spouse without the addiction unsure of what to do next.
Can they help their partner? Should they leave or would that be wrong? How much is too much to put up with? They love this person, they care for them, but they dont think they can keep going through it; would it be selfish to leave the spouse who refuses to change and live their own life? These are just four examples of the many questions that enter ones mind. There is also the fear that can play into the situation, depending on what they feel they have to lose if they leave their addicted spouse. The fear involved can also depend on how verbally and/or physically abusive the spouse with the addiction can be. There is also the concern of the children, if there are any, especially if they are younger children under the age of twelve because they are incredibly impressionable during their younger years.
Dealing with such a situation is extremely stressful and draining. It is not one that anyone wants to experience, but many do around the world every day. At first, many will try and help their husband or wife fight their addiction; sometimes they are successful, other times they are not. Many will live in the situation for many years, while some will leave after a short time. It all depends on how long someone wants to, and can, try and put up with the situation and make the marriage work.
Going through such an experience is not only unnerving; it is confusing, frustrating and painful. It can make the victim feel very alone in the world and at a loss of what to do. Time stops for them and they are suddenly not living at all, just going through the motions every day, walking on eggshells and hoping that things will get better. What many dont realize, is that there is someone they can talk to. They even have access to an online counselor if they did a quick search online for online counseling. An online therapist is there to talk with anyone who asks for their help. They will work with the patient and help to guide them through their difficulties. Online therapy can be extremely beneficial to anyone who needs to find some direction in their life and decide on what they should do, because it can help them take some time out and seek out what they truly feel they should do.